undiagnosed2

 

I’m not sure how long I’ve had Cushing’s. I think it’s been a slow progression for about 20 years.

In April my father passed away and we were on our way to Church for his mass. We got smashed from behind turning into the Church’s driveway, we ended up in an ambulance. At the hospital they did a full body CT scan. (I would have never gotten one if the accident never happened.) They found a growth on my adrenal gland. That started the ball rolling. I believe my father was responsible for helping me discover the problem.

I started looking on the internet about adrenal tumors. It talked about Cushing’s. Each and every symptom they described I had. It explained soooooo much. I thought I was going through early menopause. I was suicidal, and severly depressed, on 2 different medications to help. I chalked everything up to being “fat”. I didn’t go to the doctor because I didn’t want to hear “you just need to lose some weight.”

I went to an endocrinologist, she started me on the first urine test and some blood work. Two weeks later, I went back to get the results. I told her about Cushing’s and that I had all the symptoms. She said the results were abnormal but it could be a number of different things. She wanted to repeat the urine test and said that I SEEMED to be convinced that it was Cushing’s Disease. Needless to say I felt pretty stupid. When the results came back guess what?

After the accident the tumor seemed to have gotten aggravated. I was having a lot more confusion, loss of focus, etc. I chalked it all up to the accident, maybe it was a concussion. Since then it’s become worse. I get frustrated and depressed because I’m experiencing a lot more forgetfulness, and confusion. My depression meds are holding me up but barely. I’m tired all the time. My husband sometimes, I feel, doesn’t believe me and gets frustrated. My kids are always asking me if I’m okay (and usually the answer is no). I don’t want them to grow up remembering how I was always so sick and tired.

My next step is to get the tumor removed. The neurosurgeon is busy and my tumor is not life threatening so I had to wait a long time (couple of weeks) for a consultation. I finally saw him an now I’m waiting for the ENT to get back from vacation to set a date. So, I’m in limbo. Not helping!

My next step is to get the tumor removed. The neurosurgeon is busy and my tumor is not life threatening so I had to wait a long time (couple of weeks) for a consultation. I finally saw him an now I’m waiting for the ENT to get back from vacation to set a date. So, I’m in limbo. Not helping!

After the surgery am I supposed to be “normal?” I’m afraid of “normal.” I don’t know what it’s like to be “normal.” Will I be a different person? Will I no longer be fat? Will I get rid of the hypertension, and diabetes? the redness everyone thinks is sunburn? will I be able to get into a standing position from the floor? I’m very FRIGHTENED of the “normal” that I’m supposed to become.

The surgery, no problem, my dad’s watching over me. I’m convinced he’s responsible for finding the tumor and will help me through.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, although this bio only scratches the surface.

 

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